If you read only one blog full of ranting and raving about sports (local and otherwise), movies, TV shows, miscellaneous pop culture, life and other assorted flotsam and jetsam, make it this one!

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

#EverySimpsonsEver -- Day One

The greatest twelve days in the history of television is nearly upon us.

Starting tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. Eastern time, FXX begins airing a marathon of every single episode from the first 25 seasons of "The Simpsons," plus "The Simpsons Movie," in order. I desperately wanted someone to sponsor my attempt to stay awake for the entire twelve days and watch the entire marathon. I mean, I would need some support to even attempt that -- people to cheer me on, prepare my food and beverages, someone to slap me awake after a few seconds of dozing -- but it did not happen because no one with money or power apparently follows me on Twitter, and nothing I've said or done online has ever gone viral.

Anyway, I thought that I'd post daily listings of at least five must-see episodes. And, to be fair, at least one that you can skip, if you're going to try and watch as much as possible and want the occasional nap. (The "at least" part is because I couldn't limit this first day to just five. As much as I love the show, I may not have this problem by the end of the marathon.)


8/21 12:30 PM ET “Moaning Lisa” -- I know many people don't care for the Lisa-centric episodes but I identify with her struggles a little, and I loved Marge's response to Lisa's following her advice.

8/21 4:30 PM ET  “Bart Gets an 'F'” -- Bart's going to have to repeat the 4th grade unless he passes a makeup test. As he didn't study, he prays for school to be closed due to a blizzard. God answers his prayer...

8/21 5:00 PM ET “Simpson and Delilah” -- The first episode that touched on the gay thing. Homer commits insurance fraud to obtain Dimoxinil, which cures his baldness and leads to a promotion to an executive job -- and an assistant, played by Harvey Fierstein.

8/21 6:00 PM ET “Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes on Every Fish” -- Commentary on a political system that has only gotten worse since this originally aired. Mr. Burns runs for governor and is doing terribly in the polls, until his handlers execute a comeback. Then he has a televised dinner at the home of a regular family: the Simpsons. Oops.

8/21 7:30 PM ET “Bart vs. Thanksgiving” -- Features one of my early favorite moments, when Homer explains to Bart, who doesn't recognize Bullwinkle or Underdog, that the Macy's Thanksgiving parade shouldn't be flooded with "flash-in-the-pan" balloons...as a Bart Simpson balloon appears on their TV screen. Also: Bart makes Lisa cry. Then they make me cry.

8/21 8:30 PM ET “Itchy & Scratchy & Marge” -- My favorite episode ever, I think. Marge's protest against violence in cartoons leads to the end of Itchy & Scratchy as we know it.

8/21 9:30 PM ET “One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish” -- It may be Homer's last day alive due to eating possibly poisoned fugu at a sushi bar. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa perform "The Theme from 'Shaft'" in the karaoke bar.


8/21 12:00 PM ET “Bart the General”
8/21 1:30 PM ET “The Telltale Head”

Okay, you probably won't need a nap during the afternoon of the very first day, but these two Season 1 episodes didn't connect with me like the others.

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