Musical Three-Minute Eggs

Lately I've been listening to, as much as I can, all the songs in my iTunes library that I haven't played all year. (Oh, good lord, another year is almost down the tubes...) In order to get as many as I can out of the way, I put them all in a playlist and then put it in order of time (length of the track). That meant a lot of very quick tracks, such as those little interludes (musical, spoken word, whatever) that artists like Janet Jackson put in between songs, or old WAV files such as lines from cartoons, went first, in very rapid order.

The other day I got to the 3:00 mark -- all the songs that, according to the mp3 info, are exactly three minutes long. (We interrupt this story for a DISCLAIMER! With mp3s sometimes being obtained from various sources, there can be a bit of blank space before or after a song, so you may not hear exactly three minutes of music. We now return you to our previously scheduled programming.) This reminded me of something my former boyfriend used to do. He told me that, in order to make soft-boiled eggs, they had to boil for three minutes. So he would play the song "When Will I See You Again" by the Three Degrees, because it was exactly three minutes long. That gave me the idea for this post: the list of 3:00 songs in my iTunes library. And while I don't have that Three Degrees song, I do have a cover, as you can see...

When Will I See You Again - Erasure
You've Really Got A Hold On Me - The Miracles
Children Of The Revolution - Bono, Gavin Friday and Maurice Seezer
Hello - Kelly Clarkson
Sing - Kristin Chenoweth
The Way You Look Tonight - Olivia Newton-John
Dance To The Music - Sly & The Family Stone
Every Little Bit Hurts - Brenda Holloway
She Tracks My Tears (mashup) Smokey Robinson & The Miracles/The La's
Darts Of Pleasure - Franz Ferdinand
Christmas in Hollis - Run-D.M.C.
Paid To Smile - The Lemonheads
Burning Man - Third Eye Blind
The Fool On The Hill - The Beatles
Shoplifters Of The World Unite - The Smiths
Do You Know The Way To San Jose - Dionne Warwick
Shiver - Maroon 5
Your Wonderful, Sweet, Sweet Love - The Supremes
The Right Thing To Do - Carly Simon
Vacation - The Go-Go's
The Ballad Of John & Yoko - The Beatles
Now That You Got It - Gwen Stefani
Promises, Promises - Dionne Warwick
The Christmas Waltz - Kristin Chenoweth
Favorite T - The Lemonheads
Candyman - Jason Nevins feat. Greg Nice
The Christmas Song - Ella Fitzgerald
It Takes Two - Marvin Gaye & Kim Weston
Kill The Pain - INXS
Liar Liar - Debbie Harry
For One Night Only - Bodyrockers
Everything Is Everything - Phoenix
Rushing - Moby
Gimme Some Lovin' - The Spencer Davis Group
Give A Little More - Maroon 5
Never Can Say Goodbye - Gloria Gaynor
Airplanes - B.o.B (feat. Hayley Williams of Paramore)
Santa Stole My Lady - Fitz & The Tantrums
Somewhere Along The Way - Nat King Cole
Give Love On Christmas Day - The Jackson 5
Little Of Your Time (Of Montreal Remix) - Maroon 5
Sleigh Ride - Arthur Fiedler and the Boston Pops Orchestra
Somebody To Love - Jefferson Airplane
Baby Come Home - Scissor Sisters

Quick Reviews: Sparkle, Hit and Run

So it appears I'm not being called back to my job in September, or any time soon, as the state is cutting back on the number of temporary employees for the heating assistance program. With things being less busy on weekday afternoons at the movie theaters as kids go back to school, I could make an effort to see more movies than I have been this year and not have to worry about crowds. Of course, Hollywood will have to make more movies that interest me enough to go more often.

"Sparkle" primarily interested me because it's a remake of a movie from 1976 that was said to have been inspired by the story of Diana Ross and the Supremes. So I expected its plot to have a lot of similarity to "Dreamgirls," but was surprised by how much it was not like the saga of the Supremes (other than there being a singing group comprised of three young women). There was a lot more melodrama (although, based on the Wikipedia entry for the original, not quite as much as there used to be) in the story of Sparkle (Jordin Sparks), who is a songwriter but doesn't have the confidence to be a solo act. She and her sisters (Carmen Ejogo and Tika Sumpter) form a group that looks to be on the way to stardom despite the disapproval of their mother (Whitney Houston) until an abusive husband and an addiction to drugs get in the way. Despite the plot machinations, this was almost a very good film. But Sparks just isn't commanding enough to be the superstar that Sparkle is supposed to become. Ejogo is the real star of the three sisters in the group. And seeing Whitney Houston perform the gospel hymn "His Eye Is on the Sparrow" made me sad, because we can only imagine how it would have sounded had she been in her prime, before her own addictions and bad marriage set her on a path to her untimely death. My grade: C-plus.

I was surprised at how much I liked "Hit and Run." It's the story of a former bank robbery getaway driver (Dax Shepard) who leaves Witness Protection to drive his girlfriend (Kristen Bell) to Los Angeles for an important job interview, which puts them both in jeopardy of being killed by his old bank-robbing pals (including Bradley Cooper) thanks to her ex-boyfriend's jealousy. At first I cringed at the arrival of the most inept U.S. Marshal in history (Tom Arnold), but even his character became tolerable after a while. And there's quite a bit of pro-gay stuff, despite the jokes about prison rape (which you see, in a censored version, in the movie's trailer). There's a gay cop who uses an app called Pouncer -- not Grindr, Pouncer (or maybe it's spelled Pouncr?) -- and learns of the homosexuality of another character, and a discussion about the use of the word "fag" for someone who's "lame." Kristin Chenoweth has a fun supporting role, and Bell and Shepard, a real-life couple who, according to Wikipedia, refuse to get married until same-sex marriage is again legal in California, have a sweet chemistry. This movie didn't drum up much box office but deserves a better fate. My grade: B-plus.

Self-Promotion And Other Randomness

I once thought, not seriously, about wearing a t-shirt or hat with the URL of this blog, just to see if people asked about it or if it created more traffic. I suppose I could still do that. It's certainly a better method than this:

That's on a stall in the men's room at the AMC Franklin Mills theaters. (Yes, I actually saw movies this weekend! I may write about them someday.) And it's an actual Twitter account, although not one I'd ever follow, unless they followed me first.

Meanwhile, I'm still waiting for the heating assistance funding to be completely spent so they'll lay me off from work. As I understand it I would be eligible for unemployment but they have a bunch of rules for new applicants requiring them to jump through hoops applying for other jobs. I'm not sure I want to bother with all of that. I'm going to look for work once I'm laid off, but I want to do it on my terms. Does that seem weird?

Anyway, until then my free time is still rather limited, and with other stuff going on lately I've really been struggling mentally. I just need to hang on a little while longer.

Just wanted to throw a TV note in here: I tried to watch the premiere of "GCB," but after two different attempts I just can't get into it, so it's now deleted from my DVR. Sorry, Kristin Chenoweth.

A Little More On My Christmas Music

I just thought it would be fun to share how many versions of various Christmas songs are in my iTunes (out of the total of 468 holiday tracks), and the most notable performers of each...

Angels We Have Heard On High - 6; Aretha Franklin, "Glee" cast
Auld Lang Syne  - 5; Barenaked Ladies, Chris Isaak (and why is New Year's music played on Christmas?)
The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting...) - 8; Nat King Cole (duh), two versions by Ella Fitzgerald
The First Noel - 4; Annie Lennox, David Archuleta (I think these two names back to back form some sort of musical oxymoron)
Frosty the Snowman - 5; the Ronettes, two versions (again) by Ella Fitzgerald
God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen - 5; Annie Lennox, Rascal Flatts, Barenaked Ladies feat. Sarah McLachlan
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - 6; Pretenders, Kermit the Frog
I'll Be Home For Christmas - 4; Fats Domino, Kristin Chenoweth
Jingle Bells - 8 (if you include "Jingle Bells?" by Barbra Streisand and the medley "Jingle Bells/Jingle Bell Rock" by the Muppets)
Joy To The World - 5; Lee Greenwood, the Supremes
The Little Drummer Boy - 8; two up-tempo versions by Alexander O'Neal and the Salsoul Orchestra
O Holy Night - 7; Neil Sedaka, and a very funky cover by Musiq Soulchild
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - 9; Gene Autry, Meredith Brooks, and only one version by Ella Fitzgerald
Santa Baby - 4; Eartha Kitt, Madonna, Everclear (male vocal, changed lyrics because heaven knows the band had to butch it up) and Miss Piggy
Santa Claus is Coming to Town - 8; the Four Seasons, the Supremes, the Looney Tunes (I own the CD "Have Yourself A Looney Tunes Christmas" -- not the greatest Bugs Bunny & Company work Warner Bros. has put out there, although it's mildly amusing at times)
Silent Night - 13 (this looks like the winner); Wynonna, Mahalia Jackson, the Salsoul Orchestra (non-discofied!)
Sleigh Ride - 9 (including the Kristin Chenoweth/John Pizzarelli duet medley of "Sleigh Ride/Marshmallow World" but not including the Alexander O'Neal song with the same title but different lyrics; I also have a version by the Spice Girls
White Christmas - 7; besides the obvious Bing Crosby, there's Darlene Love, the Supremes...and there goes that Ella Fitzgerald again with two versions...
Winter Wonderland - 6; of course, my favorite is by Eurythmics, though you can't go wrong with Johnny Mathis
We Wish You A Merry Christmas - 4, including Weezer

And with that, I wish you a Merry Christmas as well, if you celebrate it. Or, just follow Krusty the Clown's advice: "So, have a merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, kwazy Kwanzaa, a tip-top Tet, and a solemn, dignified Ramadan. Now a word from MY god: our sponsor!"

Quick Review: You Again

When I first saw the trailer for "You Again," I decided I really wanted to see it. Looking back, I think I got caught up in all the Betty White frenzy during the spring (leading up to her hosting "Saturday Night Live"), since she was featured in the trailer. The actual film left a lot to be desired, though. Not because of Betty White. The whole premise was obnoxious. The film starts in 2002, where a teenaged girl named Marni is being harassed and bullied by the more popular, prettier girls -- one in particular, JJ (Odette Yustman) is the leader of the pack. Forward to the present, where Marni (Kristen Bell) is now a successful PR exec. She goes home for the wedding of her brother and learns that he's marrying the very same girl, who tortured her in high school -- except now she's Joanna, not JJ, and she's sweet and nice and does lots of volunteer work and doesn't seem to remember Marni at all. Marni's mom Gail (Jamie Lee Curtis) counsels her to let go of the past and make nice with Joanna, but then they meet Ramona (Sigourney Weaver), the bride's aunt -- and Gail's rival in high school. Eventually things get ridiculous. There are some good things about the movie, though. Besides the aforementioned Betty White (as Marni's grandmother), I always enjoy Sigourney Weaver in a comedy. Kristin Chenoweth is loads of fun as a wedding planner. At the end Marni's grandma meets Joanna's grandma -- of course, they were also rivals in their younger days -- and there's a great cameo. And, finally, there's the groom, played by James Wolk (billed as "Jimmy" Wolk in the credits). Wolk was the star of the new Fox series "Lone Star" until it was canceled after two weeks due to dismal ratings. This is important because, well, just look at him below...we've got to keep this man working, and shirtless. My grade: C-plus.