Quick Reviews: Sparkle, Hit and Run

So it appears I'm not being called back to my job in September, or any time soon, as the state is cutting back on the number of temporary employees for the heating assistance program. With things being less busy on weekday afternoons at the movie theaters as kids go back to school, I could make an effort to see more movies than I have been this year and not have to worry about crowds. Of course, Hollywood will have to make more movies that interest me enough to go more often.

"Sparkle" primarily interested me because it's a remake of a movie from 1976 that was said to have been inspired by the story of Diana Ross and the Supremes. So I expected its plot to have a lot of similarity to "Dreamgirls," but was surprised by how much it was not like the saga of the Supremes (other than there being a singing group comprised of three young women). There was a lot more melodrama (although, based on the Wikipedia entry for the original, not quite as much as there used to be) in the story of Sparkle (Jordin Sparks), who is a songwriter but doesn't have the confidence to be a solo act. She and her sisters (Carmen Ejogo and Tika Sumpter) form a group that looks to be on the way to stardom despite the disapproval of their mother (Whitney Houston) until an abusive husband and an addiction to drugs get in the way. Despite the plot machinations, this was almost a very good film. But Sparks just isn't commanding enough to be the superstar that Sparkle is supposed to become. Ejogo is the real star of the three sisters in the group. And seeing Whitney Houston perform the gospel hymn "His Eye Is on the Sparrow" made me sad, because we can only imagine how it would have sounded had she been in her prime, before her own addictions and bad marriage set her on a path to her untimely death. My grade: C-plus.

I was surprised at how much I liked "Hit and Run." It's the story of a former bank robbery getaway driver (Dax Shepard) who leaves Witness Protection to drive his girlfriend (Kristen Bell) to Los Angeles for an important job interview, which puts them both in jeopardy of being killed by his old bank-robbing pals (including Bradley Cooper) thanks to her ex-boyfriend's jealousy. At first I cringed at the arrival of the most inept U.S. Marshal in history (Tom Arnold), but even his character became tolerable after a while. And there's quite a bit of pro-gay stuff, despite the jokes about prison rape (which you see, in a censored version, in the movie's trailer). There's a gay cop who uses an app called Pouncer -- not Grindr, Pouncer (or maybe it's spelled Pouncr?) -- and learns of the homosexuality of another character, and a discussion about the use of the word "fag" for someone who's "lame." Kristin Chenoweth has a fun supporting role, and Bell and Shepard, a real-life couple who, according to Wikipedia, refuse to get married until same-sex marriage is again legal in California, have a sweet chemistry. This movie didn't drum up much box office but deserves a better fate. My grade: B-plus.

Quick Review: Burlesque

Many people want to compare "Burlesque" to "Showgirls." I've never seen "Showgirls" except for a clip here and there, so I can't make a direct comparison but from what I know about it, I'd put it this way: "Burlesque" is a cleaned-up, sugary, bright and sunny version of "Showgirls." It's like a fantasy-world combination of "Showgirls" and "Flashdance" and and any old sitcom or movie where the gang gets together to put on a show to save the orphanage or theater or whatever. It's like a cartoon without the animation. And it's pretty gay. Christina Aguilera hops on a bus from the middle of nowhere and escapes to Hollywood hoping to become a famous singer, and ends up as a waitress at a burlesque house owned by Cher. Christina has talent to burn but needs a chance. Cher needs to make lots of money quick or she'll lose the building. There's singing, dancing, romantic melodrama (Aguilera and Cam Gigandet --if I recall correctly from three days ago, with all the implied sexuality, he's the only one to get naked, even if only for a couple of quick butt shots), some humorous lines, villains of sorts, and what are the chances that everything isn't somehow going to work out? Even Kristen Bell (the burlesque show's star prior to Christina's arrival), who drinks a lot, doesn't seem to suffer all that much. It's like cotton candy: it's not healthy, it won't fill you up, but you just want to eat it all up anyway. My grade: B.

Quick Review: You Again

When I first saw the trailer for "You Again," I decided I really wanted to see it. Looking back, I think I got caught up in all the Betty White frenzy during the spring (leading up to her hosting "Saturday Night Live"), since she was featured in the trailer. The actual film left a lot to be desired, though. Not because of Betty White. The whole premise was obnoxious. The film starts in 2002, where a teenaged girl named Marni is being harassed and bullied by the more popular, prettier girls -- one in particular, JJ (Odette Yustman) is the leader of the pack. Forward to the present, where Marni (Kristen Bell) is now a successful PR exec. She goes home for the wedding of her brother and learns that he's marrying the very same girl, who tortured her in high school -- except now she's Joanna, not JJ, and she's sweet and nice and does lots of volunteer work and doesn't seem to remember Marni at all. Marni's mom Gail (Jamie Lee Curtis) counsels her to let go of the past and make nice with Joanna, but then they meet Ramona (Sigourney Weaver), the bride's aunt -- and Gail's rival in high school. Eventually things get ridiculous. There are some good things about the movie, though. Besides the aforementioned Betty White (as Marni's grandmother), I always enjoy Sigourney Weaver in a comedy. Kristin Chenoweth is loads of fun as a wedding planner. At the end Marni's grandma meets Joanna's grandma -- of course, they were also rivals in their younger days -- and there's a great cameo. And, finally, there's the groom, played by James Wolk (billed as "Jimmy" Wolk in the credits). Wolk was the star of the new Fox series "Lone Star" until it was canceled after two weeks due to dismal ratings. This is important because, well, just look at him below...we've got to keep this man working, and shirtless. My grade: C-plus.