Quick Review: Rise Of The Guardians

I saw this animated film a couple of weeks ago, and it's still around. I suppose that's because one of the characters is Santa Claus, so it qualifies as a "Christmas" movie and they can keep it in the theaters until we get into 2013. But it isn't entirely focused on the Christmas holiday.  When I first heard about this movie being made I was very much excited -- a group consisting of Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, etc. are action heroes teaming up to stop a threat to the world's children, but they need the help of Jack Frost, who in this story is a teen prankster and far from interested in helping. Then I saw the trailers and it was...actually discouraging. The end result was somewhere in between. The plot was kind of dull at times and the villain doesn't particularly seem like a terrible threat, and Santa's elves in this movie are a very poor imitation of the "Despicable Me" minions. And, for some reason, Santa (as voiced by Alec Baldwin) is Russian. It had a few bits that were okay, though. Very much a mixed bag. My grade: C-plus.

The Day I Was Santa Claus

And now, a Christmas story! No, not that Christmas Story.

Once upon a time (because all of these tales have to begin with that, don't they?) there was a little boy. He was in the third grade when his school decided, in the middle of the year, that he should be in fourth grade instead because they thought he was so smart that he was bored in third grade. From then on, he was always a year or so younger -- and more importantly, less mature -- than the other kids in his class, and it was really tough. Grade-wise he was able to keep up, but when it came to making friends and such, that didn't really happen at all.

(Let's drop the third-person narrative now. Of course, this is about me.)

Flash-forward to a few years later. I think I was in 7th or 8th grade. One of those "My Weekly Reader" type publications had a short Christmas play in it, and our teacher decided that our class would perform the play for the 1st- and 2nd-grade kids right before schools shut down for the holidays. So she was asking who wanted to play various roles -- elves, reindeer, etc. For some unknown reason --

Now I REALLY Have The Christmas Spirit!

Santa, on the other hand, has had some Christmas spirits...



I haven't laughed this hard in a while!